Here’s a mindset secret that 99.99% of sexually frustrated men do not know:
It’s not about you at all. It’s about HER.
In order to get everything you want, you simply give her everything she wants, and more. Give her things she didn’t even know she wanted until she experiences it.
She will then see to it that you get everything you want, and possibly even surprise you with things you didn’t even think of.
Change her mindset from it being about you, to it being about her.
For example, most women think that phone sex is so the man can get a thrill fantasizing about what the woman is wearing. You have to change that mindset.
You have to change it into being about her fantasies and desires overtaking her until she cannot help but touch herself.
Of course, you do not outright state this to her. Instead, you simply gently lead her.
For example, when on the phone, just tell her that you miss being with her. She will affirm.
Then tell her that you wish you were there with her now. She will affirm. Then tell her what you would do if you were there with her right now. She will listen and get lost in it. You will create a reality in her mind in which she can become sexual. She will start masturbating and fantasize that you really are there doing to her the things you are describing. It is all for the purpose of getting her off.
But if she sarcastically retorts with, “Are you going to ask me what I am wearing so you can get off?” as if phone sex is for men to get off, then the situation has become pathetic.
You have not done your preparation work correctly. You have not set the context that it is about her inner sexual creature being brought to life.
If she said that, then the situation has already spoiled to the point that it is no use repairing. Reply to her with, “I assumed you would enjoy hearing what I would do if I were there. If you don’t, we can talk about something else.”
(You also might want to improve your girlfriend selection skills.)
It is not about you getting sex; it is about you obliging her need for really good sex. You have to change both your mindset on that and her mindset on that.
That’s the entire point of dirty talk and phone sex. It’s about engaging her mind and making it about her pleasure.
Dirty talk is the number one skill that you need to develop in your Master-Lover arsenal.
Learn how to do that here.
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